What Will Samantha Watch?

Say hi to Samantha, she’s not quite two weeks old, she’s done her baby-ly duty by being painfully cute, and she made me an uncle – yay!

My brother and his wife have their work cut out for them, raising a child in world that has changed so radically since the previous generation, notably the access that young 'uns have to information and media. Aside from the obvious dangers that presents, how do you choose what you expose your kidlet to? Not just to keep her safe, but to try to make her, y’know... cool? That’s my job – be the cool uncle.

It pains me to be on the other side of the country right now. Flights back to Edmonton from Toronto this summer are way too expensive compared to last year, for some reason, so I won’t get to see Samantha until December, most likely. At least that’ll give me plenty of time to make a list of movies she needs to see when she’s old enough for a viewing experience that goes beyond shapes, colours and noises (although that pretty much describes the highlights of most movies at the multiplex at any given time – yeah, I saw Jonah Hex this week).

Where to start…where to start…where to start? Hmmmmmm…

I think a good introduction to the post-Teletubbies/Wubzy/Doodlebops/whatever-other-shows-strain-one’s-masculinity-with-their-very-names world is Finding Nemo. Even if you can’t yet follow the story, there are plenty of fun shapes, cheery colours and stimulating noises for the young viewer – not to mention, adults can dig it too. (I want to state for the record right now that it’s not my problem if my brother and sister-in-law have to buy their child a clown-fish afterwards – cool uncle amnesty.)

When she’s older, I’d like to introduce her to Monsters vs Aliens, not just because monsters fighting aliens is way cool when you’re a kid (or adult), but the main character Ginormica, is a great role model for girls, teaching them that it’s OK to be different, you should accept others for who they are, and – the best part – it’s perfectly OK to be an independent woman and not marry a jerk-nut weatherman.

After that, Wall-E, with its cute robots and vital messages about being kind to the Earth and your own body. Sea creatures, monsters, aliens, robots – I’d say that’s a pretty good mix so far.

But traditional animation is a must too – can’t just feed the kid computer graphics. I’m not one for most traditionally animated Disney movies, though, as few things on this earth are worse than singing cartoon animals (that doesn’t include Madagascar, which is pretty hilarious yet has a bit of singing). Kids may love that stuff, I can’t condone it in good conscience. No, cool uncle will bring over a copy of Brad Bird’s Iron Giant – an anti-militarism movie featuring a friendship between a young boy and s giant weaponized robot that wants peace. There’s no need to assume that just because she’s a girl, it should be all princesses, mermaids and unicorns (although, eventually she’ll need to see The Last Unicorn, of course).

Other traditional animated movies in baby Samantha’s future will hopefully include the imagination-sparking Fantasia, Spirited Away (or anything by Hayao Mayazaki) and any of the Dr. Seuss specials, starting with How the Grinch Stole Christmas!  And, one day, later down the road, Charlotte’s Web, naturally. And absolutely no Shrek! I'll spare her the shameless mugging and badly dated pop-culture references.

Ack, the list is getting huge and I haven’t covered live-action yet! What about the Muppet movies? Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory? Microcosmos? Jacob Two-Two Meets the Hooded Fang? The NeverEnding Story? The freakin’ Wizard of freakin’ Oz?!? I didn’t realize this cool uncle business was going to be so much work!

Good thing you’re worth it, Samantha – welcome to the world. (And congratulations, Brad and Erin.)

-Dave Alexander